The Art & Struggle of Practicing Vulnerability

Oooof. Loaded title, huh?

I’ve recently started reading Brene Brown’s “Rising Strong”. I loved her “Daring Greatly” research, about being gutsy enough to dare to be great, and when I saw her speak at the Silicon Valley Conference for Women a couple years ago, I felt something shift in my mind.

That maybe I could turn my dreams into a reality… if I just allowed myself to follow my dream.

But what about all the things that could go wrong? What about paying my loans? What would people think about me?

Enter, vulnerability.

In order to take a leap, you have to allow yourself to be vulnerable. You’re willing to put yourself out there, to a world that owes you absolutely nothing. You’re going to fall. You’re going to fail.

And as Brown says in the introduction of her book, the magic happens when you start to get up again.

I was a clumsy kid (and still am as an adult). For as many times as I fell, twisted something, broke a bone or bumped into the side of the couch, you would have thought that I would be become more graceful in my falls. If anything, I feel like my falls have become louder, more painful, and harder to recover from.

Why? As an adult, shame plays a bigger role in my life than it did as a kid.

If you are falling gracefully, you aren’t aiming high enough.

As I’m reading this book, I can feel a shift again – mainly in my relationships. I explained some of Brene’s book to my husband, and both of us promised to try to be more open about what we are feeling. Instead of getting into a fight because the pasta was cooked too long, we are working to articulate to each other that “it was a long day, and XYZ”. To really get to the heart of the matter.

To be truly vulnerable with each other. To peel back the layers of work life, life life, history and the baggage that we all carry, to really truly know and respect each other.

Is it pretty? No. Is it painful? Just as any sort of growing pains.

But is it worth it? Absolutely.

I’m taking this practice of vulnerability to my entire life. Learning to ask for what I want, and taking the fall, or enjoying the high. The good stuff happens outside your comfort zone, and pushing that comfort zone away and living in that area of vulnerability and valuable DIScomfort is where we will find out our true strength.

Want to join me in reading this book? Sign up for my email list, and we can read it together. Have a book you think I should read next? Shoot me a note!

2018: Looking Forward

It’s the first Friday of 2018, and as I’m staring down below freezing temps, I figured it would be the perfect time to chat about what I’m excited about in this new year.

Wait – no reflection on 2017?

2017 was one of the most action packed years I’ve had – I got married, I started working at Sweat Fixx,  I was reposted by SELF magazine, and rebranded my blog (just to name a few of the things). I don’t think I have enough time or space to accurately give a reflection on the year.

If I were to sum up 2017 in a couple words, it would be “Hell Yes.”

Looking forward to 2018 – I would say that the words that will drive this year are going to be “Let’s Do This.”

Let’s throw away that fear, those excuses, and self doubt.

“Let’s Do This”.

I have some big plans for this year, personally & professionally. I took some time this weekend to sit with my husband and we wrote out what we want to accomplish this year on little slips of paper, folded them up, and placed them in a covered mason jar next to our coffee maker. Where we can see them every single day.

To remind ourselves of what we want to accomplish.

What we are working towards.

To start every day with a cup of coffee and a healthy does of “Let’s Do This.”

I’m looking forward to the challenges that will help me grow, learn and become stronger.

I’m looking forward to getting out of my comfort zone and being more active in the community – leading more workouts, hosting more yoga workshops and moderating more talks.

Taking that leap.

Going for it.

So, 2018: Let’s. Do. This.

 

Nourish Your Roots

I snapped this photo a couple weeks ago at the Topsfield Fair. My husband and I had gone out on a rainy afternoon to enjoy a date day, and to see the Monster Truck Rally.

If you know me, going to 4-H styled events and Monster Truck Rally’s is not up my ally.

But, for my husband they are a yearly tradition, deep with childhood memories and full of meaning. So, I pulled on my boots and we went.

And, I had a blast.

In between rain showers we would grab some fall fair food, take a look at the different booths around the fair grounds, and when it would pour, we would take long-winding walks through the fair’s themed barns. One had poultry (never knew there were so many different kinds of chickens), another had bunnies (we almost left with a new family members), and one was full of flowers.

That’s where I snapped this photo.

The blooms originally caught my eye. The vibrant colors popped against the stark white background. Then my eyes moved down towards the clear, see-through vase.

Carrots.

Roots.

All of the other flower arrangements hid the roots and stems – the “non-important” part. The part that isn’t “pretty”. We are all here to see the pretty blooms, right?!

The moment I saw the roots, I was captivated and even a little humbled.

How many times have we ignored or pushed away our roots and what grounds us, in order to try to focus more on our prettier bloom? Those roots, stems, thorns all help those blooms grow – so why do we hide them?

While I may not have grown up going to fall fairs, being close to farm animals or competing in 4H activities – my husband did. To be able to go to the fall festivals together (whether they are in Indiana or in Massachusetts), allows me to get to know another side of him. For me to learn more about who he is, and what his roots are.

And in doing that, I learn a little bit more about myself.

We ignore the roots sometimes because we don’t hear the compliments, we don’t get the likes, and we don’t get the “good job” for having a strong conviction, good soul and good roots.

Today, I want you to give yourself those compliments by digging deep and doing something that feeds your soul today.

Not for the likes. Not for the ‘gram. Just for you.

Show off those carrots, roots, and stems that have helped you bloom into the marvelous human that you are right now.

Do it for you.